In Times Like These

By Rev. Carol Bodeau

Dear Friends,

It has been a very difficult last week in our congregation, in our state, and in our nation.

We have just been through a nasty deluge of freezing rain, sleet, slush and snow the likes of which we haven't seen in a few years, with record cold temperatures across Tennessee. Many of us have been huddled at home, trying to stay warm and gather ourselves for the next foray out into the winter weather. This, to me, seems a sort of ironic blessing, because I personally have needed lots of time with my husband and pets, sitting by the fire, trying to make sense of our very troubled world.

A Melting Ice Cube Symbolizes Change and Transience

Last week, on Saturday, January 24th, Alex Pretti was shot and killed by ICE agents in Minneapolis, while defending others who were being challenged by those ICE agents. This tragic event comes close on the heels of the shooting of Renee Good, who was also shot by ICE agents in Minneapolis on January 7th. People have been gathering from around the nation, some travelling to Minneapolis, to try to shift the gears on what seems to be a spiraling situation there. We are, as a nation, not just grieving; we are horrified. We are utterly dismayed and shocked by the insanity that seems to be playing out on the streets of communities that have families just like ours, in homes like ours, with the same sorts of ordinary challenges and victories as our local community.

And, in our own congregation, we lost a wonderful friend in the death of Ben Tolar, who also died on Saturday the 24th, in the Smoky Mountains. We are thinking with deep care of Ben's family at this difficult time.

What do we do to stay steady, to find that calm center in the midst of such tragedy, chaos and uncertainty? There are lots of possible answers, and each person's journey is unique, but here are a few things I have been doing:

- Breathing—taking time to just breathe and acknowledge how utterly devastating this all is

- Expecting less 'performance' and prioritizing connection—staying close to family and friends, communicating when and as I feel I can, and taking time to just process it all internally

- Listening deeply to others who are also struggling, and really trying to hear them (this requires taking time first to care for myself, so my ears and heart can be open)

- Collecting resources, and thinking carefully about my responses

- Returning again and again to my core values, at the center of which is love.

What are you doing to care for yourself in this difficult time? And how can we support one another moving forward? Here are some things we can do together. On February 8th, our service will focus on how to practice self-care in such times, and why that is so important. On February 21st, TUUCAN (the Tennessee UU Community Action Network) will lead a workshop on safety—for congregations, in digital spaces, and at protests. Look for more info about that soon. And our Unitarian Universalist Association is working on all sorts of ways we can collectively get involved, to make our voices more effective together.

Please take good care of yourselves, dear ones, so that we can take good care of one another and our troubled but still incredibly beautiful and precious world.

In faith and hope,

Rev. Carol